As a long-term fan of the Margarita Movie team I was very much looking forward to my guest appearance. Being white, I didn’t add much to the ever-crucial racial mix but I did provide gender diversity so points to me for that. The day started pretty promisingly with a car crash with a Mexican dude. Dan swiftly made friends with him so that was all cool. We had lunch at Blu Jam, which was playing the US-Ghana football match at the time. Some passing crazy lady took one look at Dan and went ‘WOO GHANA,’ much to his chagrin. Even though he’s black, Dan is not from Ghana. I actually have Ghanaian family so I would have been the more appropriate target of this cry, but this lady was a little short sighted on the subject.
Moving swiftly on! We got to the Pink Taco and to be honest I was a little disappointed. Having had Nick telling me that all my tolerance to alcohol would mean NOTHING in this town had me expecting to vomit in the corner (á la the last English lady visitor) or at least needing to be carried home, but I was pretty ok after two double margaritas and a single. Clearly next time I’ll need to try harder. Actually later that evening I did try harder, more on which later. Nick thinks that the barmaids took pity on me and gave me weaker drinks but I think he’s just a lightweight. I had asked in the past why the margaritas were pink and was always told that it was an important mystery and that there was no way of knowing, so I asked the buxom bartender and apparently it’s something to do with Hibiscus flowers or some shit. MYSTERY SOLVED.
Dan and me with our MM faces on.
So nothing too crazy happened at the Pink Taco, though it’s a pretty crazy place for me in general. They don’t make ‘em like that where I come from (LDN). Off we went to see the movie.
I normally can’t stand Russell Brand but I thought he was pretty ok in Forgetting Sarah Marshall so I was vaguely up for this. Especially as the other options were Jonah Hex and Knight and Day. Dan actually desperately wanted to see Knight and Day but we persuaded him to go to Greek instead by promising to see KaD with him the next day. I think it was me that made this promise but only Han lived up to it. Sorry Dan! I really did not want to see that film. Dan claims to have hated Greek but he was dancing and laughing all the way through it so I dunno.
The film’s pretty average. It’s about a hapless record company type dude who’s dating that chick from Mad Men (not Christina Hendricks, the other one. Not January Jones either), who has to get Russell Brand from London to LA in time for a gig without imploding on the way. This felt pretty appropriate as it’s a journey I had so recently made (via San Francisco). Especially as I later visited the Griffith Observatory, which is right next to the Greek, rendering me a nerdier version of the film’s protagonist. What was kind of weird was that even the known English actors in it somehow managed to make their accents sound fake. There were some pretty good bits, including a fairly realistic threesome scene of the type one doesn’t normally get in movies (there was just something about the way she said ‘I’m gonna kiss Aldous now, is that ok?’), and Colm Meaney who is just a joy to behold whatever’s going on. Other than that I don’t remember much so either it was a forgettable movie or I was drunker than I thought. Nick and I enjoyed getting some of the English jokes that the Americans didn’t.
Will you come for my bangers, my beans and the SCALE scale:
S - Story: 6. It’s a solid basis for a story and they did some fun stuff with it but it was generally pretty average.
C - Comedy: 5. I remember laughing a fair bit but I don’t remember what at so that’s a bad sign. I suspect I wouldn’t have found it very funny had I been soberer. The bit with the drugs up the arsehole was just tedious. But the bit about mindfucking was the best thing Sean Combs has ever done.
A - Awesomeness: 3 for Colm Meaney. Other than that there was not much awesomeness.
L - Ladies: 5. I have a massive soft spot for Mad Men lady, whom I am reliably informed is actually called Elizabeth Moss or Zoe Bartlett or something like that, but she wasn’t exactly at her sexiest here. Actually sexy in general isn’t so much her thing. Rose Byrne doesn’t do much for me but she gets honourable mention for going to secondary school with Nick. The only female nudity I recall was from behind and only torso up so no luck there.
E - Et Cetera: Well afterwards we got drunk, properly this time, at Birds, and I met a very pretty lady who offered to show me around the DC Comics offices in New York when I got there (which she proceeded to do earlier this week, and that was awesome), and then Nick went home and everyone else evaporated so Dan and I went to Jumbos, which was the second time I’d been there in my short trip to LA, and then we walked all the way back to Nick’s (spoiler: about three miles) at 3am, and I was still pissed when we got there and indeed until some time into the next day, so I’ll give it an 8.